Everyone who knows me, knows I’m a home-body. I’ve got JOMO. If you haven’t heard the term before, JOMO stands for the “joy of missing out”. It’s not that I don’t love to travel or go out and do things. I absolutely love to travel and explore new places. I also enjoy shopping (when I’m in the mood to) and trying new restaurants. But as an introverted person, I prefer to stay in more than I go out. I know that I need a calm, quiet space for reflection and my own time. It doesn’t matter where I am in the world, I know I need to have a space where I can embrace the calm.

In today’s society though, everyone appears to “need” to be busy. We go to our job and work long days. For those with kids there are after-school activities. Maybe you choose to go to the gym or meet up with friends for dinner and drinks after work to catch up. The weekend rolls around and you’ve got family get-togethers or other “busyness” and a long “to-do” list. Come Sunday we fall into bed exhausted, dreading the work-week ahead.

I’m not saying that these activities are not important or fun. But over-extending ourselves can lead us to become stressed, over-worked, tired, and run-down. To be the best version of ourself, we need to take time for ourselves as individuals. However, when the majority of us get down-time it appears that most of us panic. Society has convinced us we always have to be on the go. Not many of us can just sit and enjoy the peace and quiet when we get it.

As an introvert, I tend to long for the quiet moments. For me, my home is my sanctuary and I’ve created it as such. There isn’t a space in my house I can’t enjoy “me-time” and self-reflect. I can read a book in any of the cozy corners I’ve created. I also love the Northeast summers, so I made sure to create an outdoor space that allowed me do that. I can lounge on the outdoor sofas, sit in a chair and watch the dogs play in the yard, or work in the garden. Embracing the calm gives me permission to process life, self-reflect, make decisions, realize my purpose in life, and be ever-present in the moment.

I also know many who rely on vacations as a way to escape the rat-race that is their life. For me, vacations are a way to explore another part of the world. I don’t sit by the pool soaking in all the sunshine for days – I go out and experience everything the area has to offer. It’s all about balance. I don’t need a vacation to escape my life, because I’ve created balance in my life between doing-all-the-things and embracing the calm. It’s the same when I go on vacation. We go out and explore, then we relax in our sanctuary – aka the resort or hotel room. We always make sure we have a good ratio of activities and downtime.

For those of you nodding along with this article realizing you are run-down, it won’t be easy. If you’ve been busy most of your life, then start small. You may love all the activities you do and are involved in, and that’s fine. However, you need to know when you become overworked and practice saying “no” to commitments. Create a small space in your home that can be your sanctuary. Schedule 5-10 min sessions in your calendar to sit in silence and self-reflect. For some, being alone with one’s thoughts is scary. To become a better person you need to process through those thoughts and emotions no matter where they take you. If you schedule small sessions frequently, the more comfortable you will be learning to embrace the calm.

By bringing balance to all aspects of your life, you can then enjoy vacations as the adventure they are meant to be, rather than the escape from the life you have created.